It all started with dim sum, said DaVine Joy Randolph.
It ended with knives pulled, screaming, and a near-death feeling.
Suddenly, strange noises erupted, and people started scrambling into the restaurant.
Because, like, why is everyone rushing in?
But I was like, Uhh, thats not on trend anymore.
We havent done that in a long time.
Im like, Thats weird, she said.
Then people start screaming, so then my brains like, Somethings going on.
So, in my brain, Im like, Theyve got knives.
She then began collecting as many knives as she could.
I dont know why.
I Wolverined it and Im doing these yoga breaths of fire, and Im like, This is it.
I dont know what Im preparing for, but this is it.
Then Im hearing, like, screams, and this ladys like, Not my baby!
And I was like, Oh my god, the actress said.
Then this guy comes in and Im like, Is he a threat?
Or are we cool?
And he leans over to me and hes like, Dont worry.
Im in the marines.
And I was like, Oh, were good.
It turned out that the incident was a smash-and-grab burglary that went bad.
There was a jewelry store just outside of the mall.
We need DaVine in an emergency!
Thats what we need.
